Today I am Grateful Today...

Because ..... 2 weeks ago my mom had Surgery on her Right ear drum. She had been having ear aches all summer. They finally did x-rays and cat-scans, to find out that this whole time she has had a tumor growing behind her ear drum. They biopsied it - not cancerous, but still a very dangerous procedure to remove. They needed to send her to SLC specialists for the surgery on her ear. My mom lightly asked if she could drive herself home, and the Dr. said "Look Lady (laughing), they are practically doing brain surgery here, They will drill a hole in your skull behind your ear and go next to the brain to get to the tumor, - So, um, No you cannot drive yourself home, in fact you cannot drive for a week!" We all got a little bit of a chuckle out of that story as my mom told it, trying to look at the humor in it, instead of the scary seriousness of it all. Well, they discovered during the surgery that the tumor had actually wrapped around her ear drum and they removed it as well. :(

While she was down there, she had a biopsy of a suspicious brown spot on her left leg done, and results came back that it was Malignant....(hate even saying that). So they rushed her into the Huntsman Cancer Institute across the way (They are the Big Dogs Institute when it comes to Cancer!) The surgery on her leg required taking 4in diameter chunk out of her leg above her ankle and a skin graph from her thigh to replace onto her ankle, and removing several lymph nodes in the surrounding area to see if they could get all of the cancer...or if it had spread...(our worst nightmare). So she is walking with a limp, swollen leg, and black and blue face, shaved around ear, and loss of hearing: When it rains It pours! I know it is only Monday, but the last few days have felt like an eternity as we have awaited the phone call from the doctor. Everyday that passed I wondered if it was good or bad that we hadn't heard back yet, or if it meant anything at all. Of course the night time was always when the worries started flooding in. My mind was full of so many "what ifs". Honestly I felt numb anytime I started to think that my mom could have cancer...I have to even say the word. And then to think of starting Chemo and what not. My mom means the world to me. Plus my kids need their Grandma.

But everything is going to be okay. And that is why I am grateful today. Because Today the results from the surrounding lymph came back negative. It had not Spread! What a relief. It is so hard to see your own mom going through all of this, and becoming the fragile one....when she is so physically fit and always up for adventure! Moms are the ones that take care of you...not you having to take care of them ...in a sense. They are the strong ones. My mom is very strong though and has managed her way through all of these surgeries very well! I know tomorrow may pose its own struggles and trials, but today...today is a good day. And tonight...tonight my prayers will be a little more sincere & a little more grateful. My heart will be a little stronger & a little softer. My sleep can be a little more sound & a little less stressed. So that tomorrow I can try to live with no regrets. Because you never know what tomorrow will bring.